Culinary oddities unattempted

I have thus far managed to locate only one cafe on my street with an English menu. There, one might order the following dishes, among other unappetizing curiosities:

• "A whole thing" (10 yuan)

• "80s mashed potatoes"

• "Sauce pepper steamed stinking meat"

• A "Yuanyang bachelor"

• "Shi Guo crack chicken"

• "Apricot bao mushroom chicken gristle"

• "Ten incense exploded frighten"

• "Spicy jumping shrimp"

• "Steamed spicy fish jowl"

• "Heaving shutter"

• "Pungent bullfrog"

Yeah, I went straight to McDonalds.